Why Complaining Is Causing You More Harm Than You Think

Why Complaining is Causing you More Harm than you Think.

“Complaining is draining. Complaining only takes away energy from today and never solves the problems for tomorrow.”- James Altucher. 

“A complaining tongue reveals an ungrateful heart”- William Arthur Ward.” 

At one point or another, I’m pretty certain we have all caught ourselves complaining. Perhaps it was venting to your friend over coffee about how much you hate your boss, or that you are tired from working 40 hours per week, or perhaps it was the slow (but free) wifi. Whatever it may be, negative energy and complaining can easily infiltrate your space.

Sure, it may feel as though venting provides you with a sense of release, and that it’s better to let your frustrations out rather than to hold onto them. However, studies have shown that steeping yourself into negativity causes terrible consequences for your mental and physical health.

Jeffrey Lohr (Psychology Professor at the University of Arkansas) states that “venting may make you feel different in the moment, but the change in emotional state doesn’t necessarily feel better; it may just feel less bad.

Steven Parton (author and expert in human nature), suggests that complaining not only alters your brain for the worse, however also causes serious negative repercussions for your mental health.

Thinking negatively and complaining can narrow our focus, damage our social interactions and negatively impact our mental and physical health.

So, how can we prevent ourselves from complaining and live a more positive life?


I try my best to be consciously aware of my thoughts. When I’ve put an excessive amount of energy into what others have or what others are doing, it has been one of the easiest ways for negative energy to enter my life. I have learned that one of the best ways to remain positive is to focus on the things I do have as opposed to what I don’t have. Focusing and comparing yourself to others serves no purpose and is one of the easiest ways to allow negativity into your life without even realising it.

I also like to start my mornings with a simple gratitude practice. Each morning when I open my eyes, the first thing I do is think of 1-3 things I feel grateful for in that moment. It could be as simple as having my health, waking up next to my husband and seeing the sun shining through my bedroom window. This simple practice helps me to start the day with a positive mind and is so incredibly good for the soul.


“You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.”- Jim Rohn.

Unfortunately, there are some people in the world who are just negative. It could be the friend who can’t help but to constantly gossip and speak negatively of others. Or perhaps you have a competitive colleague who is constantly envious of you and what you have achieved.

The types of relationships you have with people can have a significant impact on your health and well-being. If you surround yourself with positive people, their energy and outlook will have a positive effect on you. On the flip side, if you spend your time surrounded by Debbie-Downers, it will only be a matter of time before their negative outlook and mood will begin to rub off on you.

Be selective about your inner circle and surround yourself only with people who will elevate you and take you higher.


One of the best and most effective ways to rid your life of negativity is to love what you do. If your job/ home/ partner/ friend no longer brings you joy or happiness, perhaps it’s time to either improve the situation or is simply move on. Life is too short to settle for mediocrity. Learn to identify when things no longer serve their purpose or make you happy

One of the best ways to stay positive is to develop positive practices in your life. I personally find that my best and most positive days are when I rise early and dedicate the first 90 minutes of the day to myself. Whether it is practicing morning meditation or a boxing session to get your blood pumping, find that works for you, and do more of that.


What are some of the practices you do to prevent yourself from complaining and maintain positivity in your life? I would love to hear your thoughts- please leave your comments below!

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